(Requiem in D Minor)
We had a pretty busy day today. We’re looking at trading our 2006 Mazda 3 for a 2007 Audi A4. We initially were looking at the 2008, but the dealerships around here are trying to get rid of the ’07s, and we can basically get a $40,000 car for much, much less. And, the ’07’s aren’t different in any way from the ’08’s. We were looking at a specific one today, and it came with all the “optional” things you could get from the book, such as a navigation system, Xenon headlights, leather seats with warmers, etc etc – AND it’s a stick. You have no idea how hard it’s been trying to find a manual car in the $32,000-$38,000 price range! People get lazy when they get middle-middle class, apparently. We were looking at the 2008 Lexus SI 250 and the Mercedes C-Class; but again, no stick shift on the east coast apparently, in those models with what we want in it (namely, leather and Xenon lights).
So, that’s happy news, that we’re getting a new car. The Mazda’s getting a little cramped anyway.
Julia and I went to an art class today, at the east-coast craft store called Michael’s. I love that store, by the way; I always buy my artsy stuff from there. However, we met today probably the fourth really rude person [in regards to Julia's skin] in the whole two and a half years Julia’s been around.
(Julia has Netherton’s Syndrome, more info can be found at www.scalyskin.org or www.ichthyosis.com)
We get lots…and lots…and lots of questions on an average day, mainly because her skin has a reddish tone to it – it looks like she maybe has a rash or some eczema. We’re very used to (and appreciate – education is a fantastic thing) the normal range of questions we’re asked. Usually, after I say that she has a skin disorder, the issue is dropped and we can get on with our lives. This woman, however, was just over-the-top rude. Even other people in the class were giving her the evil eye, and the teacher was obviously embarrassed for us, because she kept going on and on and on about Julia’s skin. After I said my generic “skin disorder” comment, I pretty much ignored her and let her babble – it still irks me though.
The toughest issue I’ve had to face as a parent, I think, is setting a good example for Julia on how to deal with other people. Any parent who has a child who deviates visibly from the ‘norm’ in any way knows what I’m talking about. It’s hard – it’s really, really hard. You want to hurt the person just as bad as they’re hurting you (and in a few years when she understands, your child), but you can’t - because you’re aware of what’s acceptable behavior and what’s not; because you know that they’re talking out of literal ignorance on the subject; and because they’re probably just uneducated in general and it’s probably not worth your breath trying to explain.
And on a side note, I know the last bit there sounds incredibly ridiculous, grouping anyone who’s rude in such a manner as uneducated – but you know what, there are stereotypes for a reason; and what can I base my opinions on if not experience? When we travel to more affluent areas, such as D.C., we do not get bombarded with questions; when we travel to say, Walmart right outside the base, it’s like a 3-ring circus.
Just sayin’.
Anyway, my point is – I’m very, very glad we can count on one hand the amount of times we’ve come across ridiculously rude people like the woman at Michael’s today. Because, I feel it’s very important to teach Jules that it’s not appropriate to be rude and crass, even when other people are being rude and crass towards you; and if we came across more than 1 or 2 per year of these types of people, I might have to throw that moral out the window, because it sure takes a lot of energy not to punch them in the mouth.
Ahem. Motherly instinct and all.
I also think it’s important to teach her (and all children) to stand up for themselves when it’s appropriate – trying to not be rude or crass doesn’t mean to allow other people to step on you. It’s just a lot more difficult to take the high road; it’s a lot more difficult to teach her that way, too.
Happy news: Julia’s doing so well with Russian! She’s starting to count, she knows about 4 or 5 body parts, “up” and “down”, and the very popular “Give me!!” – among other things that I can’t remember right now.
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